What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?
You are going to look like a total fool/asshole sometimes – but COMPLETELY keep doing exactly that because you will learn soooo much.
Stand up for what you think is right and wrong.
Be afraid but don’t let fear stop you.
Trust your instincts.
I’m so excited for you!!
What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?
You don’t have to be obsessed but try a lil harder to organize the business side of your life – choosing a health care plan, getting life insurance, saving people’s addresses and phone numbers…it may not seem like the most pressing thing when fueled by the passion of 20s youth – but you have to take care of those things to support the passion of your 30s youth 🙂
Also I would have been more interested in politics (especially locally) – because being educated about who is representing your beliefs and interests is a giant part of your future.
What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” That pretty much sums it up.
Favorite memory from your 20’s?
This is really hard for me because A TON of wonderful shit happened in my 20s.
I moved from NYC to LA without ever even visiting it.
I met my amazing husband at age 21 and married him (on my farm in Iowa surrounded by love) at age 24.
We bought a house and made a home.
I adopted my first pet ever – a bunny (Chester) – then added 2 more cats – now we have a dog too…
I opened a successful business with one of my best friends.
I went topless with my size A boobies in a ridiculous sex scene in a feature film…and felt utterly liberated because I never liked my breasts before that moment.
In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?
I was a mess in my early 20’s – naive, destructive, full of self-doubt, and to trusting of people who would take advantage of a pure heart. I don’t think I was capable of imagining a full and happy life for myself. I was mostly avoiding thoughts of the future and acting pretty reckless…30 wasn’t even on my radar.
And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?
I didn’t have the normal anxiety around turning 30 that most people experience – I was really fortunate to feel accomplished in my career and safe and happy in a healthy relationship. My wonderful husband threw me a giant fabulous party, we trip planned to China, and I was training for half marathon….AND THAT’S WHEN LIFE PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE. I got suddenly diagnosed with a crazy rare symptom of Rheumatoid Arthritis that attacks the eyes – my immune system started to “melt” my Cornea by forming an ulcer that could cause me to go blind. No warning signs… I went from being utterly healthy – to taking a zillion medications a day, having IV infusions at the hospital, surgery, endless doctor appointments, ENORMOUS bills, and decisions to face about my fertility (relating to the medications). Just when you think you have it all figured out – life throws you some shit so you can grow even more.
So 30 looks challenging so far – but luckily in my 20’s – through exploration and failure I learned how to cope when things get rough. I learned gratitude for all the other spectacular things in my life and I let them shine brighter than the shadows.
Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?
Yes – especially when I figured out what I really wanted.
What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?
The greatest gift of being in my 30’s is that I have perspective. I used to put a ridiculous amount of pressure/emphasis on events (good and bad) that made everything feel extreme. I’ve discovered an evenness with the awareness that life is brilliant, unpredictable , challenging, and magical. I try not to anticipate/weight the experiences and just enjoy or endure the moments knowing so much more is ahead.
When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?
Watch out 40 – seriously. I’m going to be healthy. I’m going to LOVE even bigger than before. I’m going to dominate in business, travel, and probably be raising a pack of kids. I’m going to be a force.
What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?
My dad used to sing Neil Young to me when I was a kid – and play it for me when I was an adult. When things get rough I call him and he reminds me of one songs mantra…
Don’t let it bring you down
It’s only castles burning,
Find someone who’s turning
And you will come around.
The most important thing in life is the people you surround yourself with – who you love and who loves you – that love is the key to happiness.