Tag Archives: trusting the process

Oh, hi

2 Jun

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Well, I’m back. I hadn’t even realized it had been two months since I last blogged until I sat down to write this post. Where has the time gone? Where has Spring gone for that matter! It’s June already?? What’s that…I’m going to be 33 next month…whhhaaaat?! Sigh. It all goes too damn fast, doesn’t it? Anyway, I have many reasons as to why I haven’t blogged recently but the biggest reason…I was feeling creatively tapped out. Does that ever happen to you? The well was dry as they say. And who wants to read a blog written by a dry well. I kept trying to push myself through it, forcing myself to sit down each day and blog but in turn it was starting to feel like a job and not a creative outlet- which is not why I do this. I do this to connect with others and stay present in my day-to-day life as well as motivate myself to make my dreams a reality. So I decided to do the unimaginable for me after almost four solid years of blogging…take a break.

I took some breathing space to fill up the creative well.

Last week I began to feel the pull again though and found myself once again sitting at my desk with my trusty computer. Ideas and new energy swirling within me.

So happy to be back.

Here are a few snapshots over the last two months…

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 “What we are waiting for is not as important as what happens to us while we are waiting. Trust the process.”

 

 

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project 30 – erin

5 Feb

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Erin, 33  / Erin Joy Henry 

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

You are good enough. You are not your career, your bank account, your weight or your ex-boyfriends. Light up the room when you walk in, even if it makes others uncomfortable. I forgive you for being so hard on yourself. Start a self-care regimen, practice yoga and kindness and surround yourself with positive people. If there is too much drama in your life, take responsibility, and ask yourself how you are contributing to it and what you can do to change it. Save ten percent of every paycheck. Build strong friendships with other women, and lift each other up. Soul search until your heart is content.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

The luxury of time. I lived by myself and had a flexible schedule. I ask myself now, what was I doing with all of that time? I could have gotten so many more things done! I could have taken so many naps! Now that I have a baby, time is so precious, but so is he.

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

The opinions of people who didn’t have my best interest in mind. Those people naturally fade from our peripheral vision anyway. Why would I have cared what they thought?

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

Heading off to India with less than two weeks notice with my friend, Signe, and a group of meditators, to stay for two weeks at an ashram at the foothills of the Himalayas. It was a life changing experience, and I went back by myself the next year. If you are ever called to India( or anywhere) find a way to go. It will never be convenient or the right time, but these are the memories that shape the rest of our lives, and these deep pulls on our heartstrings to visit places are never an accident.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

Good question! I was never someone who planned out my life like that. I never had the wedding planned, the career completely sorted or even the place I would be living, though Southern California was always in the back of my mind. I thought I would be on to another career beyond modeling, which is what I had done since the age of 15, and maybe settled down a little, but 30 seemed SO far away!

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

I turned 30 while living as a single person in New York City. I had a great career as a model, a cute little apartment, I was writing for small publication and forming some life changing female friendships I am so grateful for 30 still seemed very young. I dated often, though nobody was promising as far as something long-term was concerned. I was happy, but knew I was coming to the end of a chapter. I started longing for more space, clean air and some trees. I also was ready for a real relationship, as I had been single for several years. I started planting the seeds to move to California, though I had no good reason! I just knew that’s where I was supposed to be. I finally made it happen about six months later and went back to school at the same time. I had no idea what I was doing leaving my career in New York, but I had faith it would work out. I walked into the classroom and spotted my now partner of three years, Alex, who is also the father of my fifteen month old son. It was pretty much love at first sight. Things got very stressful for a while, moving my life across the country, but it was obviously the best decision, and I”m so glad I listened to that voice again.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Are you kidding? YES! I was always a person that worried even when things were great, that the other shoe was going to drop and I needed to be prepared for the rainy day. I was a big worrier! It wasn’t until I learned how to meditate, and breathe my way through whatever feeling I was in, that it got better. The thing is, there will always be ups and downs, that’s just the way life is. I learned for me, if I can just stay as present as I can in any moment, I will get through whatever life throws my way. I’ve gotten this far, so why wouldn’t I? Knowing this, I can put more of my energy into the positive things in my life, and be grateful, especially when things are good, rather than taking up space in my mind worrying what may go wrong. It’s still something I work at. Just after my son was born, I worried I would never work again, and another career would never fall into place for me. That was such crazy thinking. I tried my best to be present as a new mom, and enjoy the time I was lucky enough to have to stay home. Months went by, but slowly my old modeling clients started calling again, and the nutrition business I have been working on for years finally came to fruition. I still can’t believe I worried things wouldn’t fall into place. There’s a saying I love- “spirit meets us at our point of action,” meaning, keep plugging along and doing the work, and things will align, but maybe not how or when we thought they would.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

The things that once seemed so hard, are easier. That comes with self-confidence and self-love, that at least I didn’t have so much of in my 20’s. I think in our 30’s we have a much clearer idea of who we are and what we want in life, so the path to get there isn’t so rocky.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

I hope I have a healthy family. I would like to have more children and some dogs, and live in a beautiful place with clean air and a big yard. It will probably be more North of Los Angeles, but I”m not sure where that is yet. I hope to continue working with people on their health goals, working in a career I love. I hope to have really good friends, and be close with my family and my partner Alex. I hope to travel often, and introduce my children to other cultures. I I hope to have financial freedom. I hope I”m still learning, reading books I never though I”d get to, and practicing yoga I never believed I could do. I hope I”m a role model, and that I worry less, and make others feel good about themselves. It’s only seven years away, but forty still seems like an eternity away!

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

I am not religious, and if you aren’t either, you can replace the word God with Universe, Spirit or whatever fits for you, but I love this one.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. – Marianne Williamson

connect with Erin – blog / twitter / instagram / facebook / pinterest 

project 30 – nailah

29 Jan

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Nailah, 30  / Donna & Nailah

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

Everything will fall into place. Stop worrying so much. You’re on the right track! Also, don’t stop working out, your metabolism will slow down.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

My finances. I wish I was more serious about saving money and not taking on additional debt. I had a good job with lots of benefits at the time but I couldn’t begin to tell you where all of that money went!

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

Myself. I was so hung up on “finding my purpose” and “living my best life” that I probably missed out on opportunities to just have fun. I felt like my life should have been much better at the time. Now I realize that I was at a great place in my life and I wish I had taken a step back and enjoyed it a little more.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

Oh man, I have a lot. I think my best memory from my 20’s was my wedding. My husband and I had a destination wedding in the Bahamas. It was amazing. We had 30 of our closest family and friends with us and we just had so much fun. When we got engaged, my husband and I promised ourselves that we wouldn’t get carried away in the craziness of a wedding and would instead focus on celebrating our love and having fun. We absolutely succeeded and I wouldn’t change anything.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

That’s a great question. In my early twenties, I got certified as a life coach and started a life coaching company. I envisioned myself working with coaching clients full-time and still living in Los Angeles with my husband. I was also working on my Master’s in Communication and assumed that I would be teaching at the college level as well.

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

I turned 30 in 2014 and it was a whirlwind of a year! We moved to San Diego, I found out that I was pregnant, and our daughter was born. My life is completely different than I envisioned it but it’s perfect. I was able to quit my job and work for myself full-time but instead of working as a life coach, I now co-own a social media marketing agency. Again, I could have never predicted any of it but when I look back on the past 10 years I can see the path that brought me to where I am now. Of course, during my 20’s I couldn’t see that clear path and I just felt like I was flip-flopping all over the place.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Oh absolutely! I was constantly worried that it wouldn’t fall into place. That was my primary stressor in my early and mid-twenties.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

I hit a point in my late twenties when things clicked into place. I knew who I was, I truly didn’t care what people thought about me and I felt good about what I was doing with my life. The greatest gift about being in my 30’s is the confidence and self-awareness that came with it. There are still things in my life that are uncertain but I have the confidence in myself to know that it will all work out and that it’s much more productive to focus on what I can control instead of constantly worrying about the future.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

The things that make my life complete now, I couldn’t have dreamed of 10 years ago. I imagine that in 10 years my life will be so different than anything I could think up now. I do hope that I’m still living my life to its fullest and taking advantage of unique opportunities thrown my way. I hope that my business is thriving and still brings me a lot of joy. I hope that I have a happy and healthy little family and that I will be teaching my kid(s) the values of love and laughter, big dreams and hard work. I hope to feel settled and happy with whatever it is that I’m doing.

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

Jump in. Feet first.

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Connect with Nailah / website / twitter @Nailahblades