Tag Archives: Jennifer Pastiloff

Ojai

10 Nov

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To celebrate our first wedding anniversary yesterday, Brian and I drove up to Ojai for the day- a sleepy little town 80 miles from Los Angeles. Ojai holds a special place in my heart. One of the last times I was there was for a weekend Manifestation Retreat with my dear friend Jen Pastiloff. That was the same weekend I drove home to a house filled with candles and roses and one very adorable and nervous boyfriend standing in the center of it all with a diamond ring in a box. Talk about manifestation! Now every time I think about getting engaged to Bri, I invariably think about Ojai.

So it seemed like a perfect place to get away for the day to celebrate year one of marriage.

The plan was to wake up early and be out the door by 8am but like most plans go we weren’t on the road until 10am. Mapquest advised us to take a different route then either of us had ever taken before. One that had us coming in the back way instead of the coastal route. Brian and I like driving new routes so we went with it. The weather was absolutely perfect for a drive through the mountains. The light was simply perfection. I kept excitedly pointing out the window and saying….Seriously?!?! How gorgeous is that?!??

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On the itinerary for the day…

A stop at Meditation Mount, a 32 acre garden perched above Ojai with a gorgeous view of the valley. We wandered the grounds taking in the natural beauty- it was so serene.

After Meditation Mount we strolled through the main drag of town exploring all the little shops. I fell in love with a new store called Fig Curated Living. If I could have, I would have purchased every single thing in that store. But since that wasn’t an option, we settled on a new Christmas tree ornament in the shape of the state of California. We thought it would be a sweet reminder every holiday season of our first wedding anniversary spent in Ojai.

Next up was lunch at Osteria Monte Grappa, an Italian place in town. We sipped on wine and beer and dined on bruschetta, avocado salad and spicy sausage pasta.

After filling our bellies we made the short drive to Old Creek Ranch Winery to go wine tasting. The last time we went to this winery it was for Brian’s 30th birthday and it was pouring rain. So this was the first time we got a good view of the property and it is lovely, it’s surrounded by rolling yellow hills. After wine tasting indoors (which is an incredible deal…ten different wines for ten dollars) we both picked our favorite (a glass of rose for me and a glass of grenache for Brian) and found a spot on the patio over looking out over the hills and took in the warm afternoon sunlight.

After finishing our glasses of wine we decided to make the drive back home, this time taking the coastal route in hopes we would catch a beautiful sunset over the water. Boy did we time it right…it was the perfect way to end the most perfect 1st anniversary.

Love you, Mr. Glodney! Here’s to many many many more.

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all photos by Brian Glodney 

inspiration, gratitude & surprises

7 Jun

happy

what inspired me this week?

Brian’s new photography site went live this week and I LOVE it.

Jen Pastiloff’s Project 30’s Q & A and then this follow-up vlog she did in response to it.

reminding myself that it’s ok to want to slow down a bit the next six months and simply enjoy the small things- taking care of myself is important.

an incredibly sweaty but AH-MAZING yoga class with Tamal and some of my favorite girlfriends Rachel, Katie & Sophie. Tuesday nights are fast becoming my favorite night of the week

“don’t give your mind so much power. most of its inner dialogue isn’t even rooted in reality. it plays upon your fears, insecurities and the more attention you feed it, the bigger the anxieties become. manage your mind, change your life.”
– Grace Yoga

my personal essay writing class at writing pad with Taffy Brodesser-Akner – she might be the funniest person I know.

what am I grateful for this week?

I had a really lovely afternoon visiting with my aunt Michelle and my mom-mom (grandmother) this week. One of the many joys of freelancing is that sometimes you have a Wednesday afternoon available to sit around with two of your favorite women and eat cheese and crackers and sip white wine. My mom-mom hasn’t been in the best health recently and it’s been really hard for me to accept, so moments like these are cherished.

what surprised me this week?

how many damn things one needs to purchase when getting a new puppy 

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find me elsewhere: instagram @kate365, twitterfacebook

project 30’s – jen

4 Jun

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Jen, 38

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

Not to care so much about what other people thought. To keep writing. Not to worry so much about being a waitress, that it would actually come in handy later. All the skills I learned would serve me endlessly as I began to work more and more with people. That being short didn’t mean anything about who I was as a person. That I would eventually find my way. That breathing was more important than I realized. That the best was yet to come.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s? 

My writing. My heart. (not my heart health, to be clear, but rather my capacity for love. For loving myself, more specifically.)

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

My appearance and my weight.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

Is it bad that I can’t remember any? I really hated my 20’s. Let’s see. I went to Italy and China for the first time but that was in my early twenties. That planted the seed for me for my Italy retreats and for my desire to travel the world. My 20’s were like one long bad dream that all meshed together. I hope people reading this who may be scared of getting older find this hopeful. Ha! I am going to write an essay about this and send it to you because you have stumped me. This inspires me. And also reminds me how much I hated my 20’s.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30? 

I thought I would be a writer living in NYC of course. Or in academia. I was a bit of a literary snob in my early 20’s while at NYU.

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like? 

I was working at the same restaurant that I had been working at since age 21 in West Hollywood. My life looked the same as it did at age 22 except I was older. I truly was like a walking dead person. It wasn’t until I was in my 30’s that I woke up and started paying attention which is at the crux of all my teachings. Paying attention. I paid little attention to anything in my 20’s. My life was falling apart around age 30 but thank God for that. That falling apart, as it were, allowed to start a new and create the life I wanted. I couldn’t be happier now but it definitely took that nervous breakdown I had to wake me up!

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Um, everyday?

What is the greatest gift about being a woman man  in your 30’s? 

I married my husband just before I turned 35! I am confident in a way I never was when I was younger. I have, as cliché as it sounds, found myself. And truth be told, I was right here all along! (I just didn’t know it.)

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

That question scares me for some reason. I have never been any good at looking into the future or planning. Damn you, Kate! Maybe this will be my next essay. Okay, here goes. I hope to have a family. My book is published and I am working with Oprah. They are little dreams, I know. I hope I am happy and healthy and still have my sense of humor. Who am I kidding? It’s a year and a half away which we all know if more like a blink away so I guess I just hope by then I have learned how to break my addiction to Facbeook and twitter. I hope I have a read a few more books. I hope my laugh lines are a deeper because I earned them.

 What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

One of my own. “At the end of your life, when you ask one final “What have I done?” let your answer be “ I have done love?”

Is it corny to quote yourself? Is that allowed? I really think it all boils down to that. I look back on all those years of waitressing and realize why I was so beloved as a server even though I stank at it. It was because I loved. I made people feel seen and heard and loved. It’s really all about that, isn’t it? I am the same Jen I was then just a bit wiser and with a few more laugh lines. Back then I thought my job defined me. I thought my weight defined me. None of it did. Nothing defines us but my God, I want to be remembered by how much I loved. People remember how big your heart was not how big your butt is.

Connect with Jen – website / blog / twitter

check-in

7 Mar

When I originally started this blog a year and a half ago, it was ALL about accomplishing my goals. My obsession with it was actually verging on insane! I was NOT going to turn 30 without accomplishing all of them.

While it is still is a blog about setting goals and making them happen, it has also become a blog about everything that happens in between! All the lovely moments that make up my life.

The other day it dawned on me though…holy shit I am more than half-way through my 30th year?!!?!? WHAT!? Seriously? WHAT?! I’m going to be 31 in four months?!?! With this daunting realization I thought it would be a good time to check-in with myself on my progress with the goals for the year….

– Overseas trip (CHECK!)

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When I put overseas trip on my list I had no idea where we would end up traveling. I just knew I needed to get out of the states and go on an adventure with Brian. We settled on Hong Kong and Nepal and I am so grateful that we did because what an adventure we had!! If you haven’t read about our trip you can below!

Big news / the travel doctor / the toe  / Hong Kong 1 / Hong Kong 2 / Arriving in Nepal / Kathmandu / Patan / the monkey temple / Bhaktapur / trekking: the group / trekking: the water buffalo / trekking: the starry night.

more posts still to come…

– Volunteer as a big sister

I made a bit of progress with this right out of the gate, settling on the organization I wanted to work with and filling out the paperwork. Then the strangest thing happened…I did nothing after that. Life got in the way and I’ve had my application folded up in my date book ever since. But, the good news is I plan on sending it in this weekend once we finally set up our printer and fax! Fingers crossed that they think I am a suitable candidate to be a big sister.

– Artist dates (CHECK!) 

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I haven’t done as many of these as I would like but I have started them! You can read about them here, here and here

– New living space (CHECK! CHECK! CHECK!)

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As much as I loved our little bungalow by the beach I wanted to move on because I couldn’t stand sharing a miniature closet with Brian anymore. That and the kitchen drove me nuts- the oven didn’t work for most of the time I lived there.  Let’s just say it was the perfect bachelor pad!

I was ready for us to have a space we could grow in. So I put this one the list thinking we would just rent another slightly bigger apartment by the beach. But sometimes the universe has bigger plans for you! Because we ending up finding a loft that we loved, made an offer, beat out seven other offers and now have a new home to build a life in. High five, Universe!

– Get a French Bulldog

Frank : inspiration photo

Frank : inspiration photo

We couldn’t get Franck until we moved but now that we have  it’s time to find our little boy and bring him home! I’m thinking we still need to settle in our new home a little bit more before we add a puppy to the mix. Soooo, maybe July? Maybe as a 31st birthday gift to myself!

– Publish my writing 

I work towards this goal everyday with my book agent. But alas I have not snagged the right book deal yet. Maybe in the meantime I should focus on publishing my writing other places. Do any of you have any fabulous leads?!

– Ballet classes 

I start a 6-week course at Align Ballet March 30th!! So very excited to get back to the barre. Posts about the experience coming soon!

– Yoga retreat (CHECK!!)

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Awwwww what a magical weekend that was. In three short days I had some major breakthroughs, adopted the motto “Be Fucking Amazing!“, laughed more than I thought possible and met two lovely ladies whom I now call dear friends. Oh, and came home to a surprise engagement!!!

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Speaking of engagements, let’s be honest, I wanted to put “get engaged” on my list of goals for the year but didn’t want to set myself up for disappointment! I also thought it would be slightly awkward to put such a thing on a public goal list. But it was on my secret list! So check that one off too!

What an interesting, life changing and fun eight months it’s been!

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
C. S. Lewis

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my rules to live by

24 Jan

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Back in October when I was at Jennifer Pastiloff’s Manifestaion Retreat she had each of us write our “rules to live by” . I find myself thinking of them often (especially when I feel like I am just getting through the day and not being mindful) and wanted to share them with you all…

My rules to live by:

1. be fucking amazing everyday

2. find the joy in everything I do

3. constantly push myself out of my comfort zone

4. write everyday

5. respect and value Brian and our relationship

6. laugh, laugh, laugh

7. enjoy the process

8. practice yoga

9. respect myself, my feelings and desires

10. worry less

11. act with love

12. live in gratitude

13. enjoy great food and wine

14. read interesting books

15. go on a travel adventure once a year

What are your rules to live by? I’d love to hear!

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be fucking amazing!

31 Oct

BE FUCKING AMAZING

Jennifer Pastiloff’s manifestation yoga retreat will always hold a special place in my heart. The whole weekend was magical- including the fact that Brian proposed to me when I got home! I manifested a husband, people! I also walked away with a lighter heart, less anxiety, a new sense of purpose, hysterical memories, a sense of community and new friends.

I also learned I’m not alone in feeling insane sometimes!

Leading up to the retreat, I was feeling nervous about it. I knew that the experience would force me out of my comfort zone. First of all, as ridiculous as this may sound, I usually hate organized group activities. I was the kind of kid who never went to summer camp because even then I hated organized group activities. I am still that kid as much as I pretend not to be.

I have also been battling anxiety recently and I was feeling energetically heavy from it. Boxed in by it. For those of you who have never experienced anxiety, it can be an overwhelming force- it feels like a big heavy cloak and I wasn’t sure I had it in me to go but I knew I needed something. I knew I needed to push myself out of it and out of my comfort zone because I have learned, through tackling my goals on 365 til 30 the last year, that the other side of my comfort zone is a pretty incredible place. It’s a more alive, aware and brave place. It’s the space I want to live my life in.

So I packed up my car, and off I went in search of adventure.

As I have said before, Jennifer is a force of nature. She’s incredibly positive and passionate as well as brutally honest about her own struggles with depression and anorexia. She isn’t running around the room sprinkling fairy dust on everyone and telling them to just be happy. While her retreats are about “manifesting your dreams”, they are also about letting go of the baggage that holds you back. About asking yourself to take an honest look at yourself and ask hard questions like…

“If I wasn’t afraid I would _________”

“Where am I playing small in my life?”

The first activity on the itinerary was opening circle. As you can imagine from the title we all (46 of us!) sat in a circle in the yoga studio and introduced ourselves. I was touched by how many different types of people Jennifer brings together. The room was filled with a trust and openness you don’t often feel with strangers. We all knew we were there to do work. We announced to the room what we were there to manifest. It was an incredibly powerful feeling to announce to a room of strangers what I was manifesting in my life.

I AM MANIFESTING A BEST SELLING BOOK.

I said it loud and I said it proud.

Jennifer shared her steps to manifesting, which I thought were just fabulous-

1.) Give a voice to your dreams. Set your intentions.

2) Write down your goals. Affirm in advance that you already have them.

3) Thank the universe, in advance, for what you are manifesting.

4) Expect to be delighted! Be in the feeling of what you want to receive.

5) Speak your goals with excitement and joy as if they are already in motion. 
Keep them fresh in your consciousness daily.

6) Take action on your dreams. Step out of your comfort zone.

7) Trust. Trust is the bridge between your asking and its manifestation.

8) Surrender and let go. Release what is no longer right for you.

9) Say YES! YES! YES! to your dreams and to who you are.

After the opening ceremony the rest of the weekend just flowed, we practiced yoga, we laughed, we danced, we cried, we wrote, we sang, we let go, we drank wine, we ate and we became a tribe. A tribe we warmly named the “Be Fucking Amazing’s”. Has a ring to it, huh?

I think pictures can speak volumes about an experience…especially when they are taken by the amazing photographer, Joe Longo.

Ojai here I come!

19 Oct

 

 

 

 

(note: the above photo is not me! Although, I’m working on it!)

I leave for my yoga retreat with the fabulous Jennifer Pastiloff this afternoon! I’m SO excited. I choose this retreat for a few reasons-

1. I have a girl crush on Jen. I met her a few years ago when I took a yoga class from her and was immediately taken with her big, bold and joyful presence. She’s full of life. Over the last year Jen has become a dear friend of mine and I am so grateful to know her.

2. It’s a manifestation retreat! Jennifer is a firm believer in manifesting your dreams and brings that into all of her classes. Let the manifesting begin!

3. I love Ojai

4. It seems like it will be a fun weekend. The itinerary made me smile. There is wine tasting tonight, a dance party on Saturday night and a karaoke yoga class!

I’ll be back next week with stories and pictures.

What are you guys up to this weekend??

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“You get to decide as many times as you like just who you are. Moment to moment. Breath to breath.” – Jennifer Pastiloff

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out summer.

5 Sep

In case you didn’t gather from the title of this blog, post summer isn’t my favorite season. This admission probably just garnered me some hate mail, but it’s the truth. When I told my mom and Brian my feelings about summer, they both looked at me as if I had just said something personally offensive to them. I guess people feel pretty strongly about summer. I’m not saying summer is all bad. I, too, enjoy long days, afternoon BBQ’s and the beach, but I find that I get tired of it all rather quickly and then I’m just hot…hot, drained and unfocused.

I much prefer the fall and winter months. I love fog. I love rain. I love bundling up in cozy sweaters. I love spending grey afternoons writing. I love the holidays. I love wearing boots. I love wearing leather jackets and scarves. I love crisp air. I love Christmas lights. I love fall movies. I love pumpkin spice lattes and gingerbread cookies. I love all things cozy. I do cozy really well. I also find that I feel more creative and alive in the fall and winter months and, well, I would welcome that feeling right about now.

While I know it’s not officially fall just yet, I have decided that now that it’s September, I’m going to act like it is. I’ve picked out soup recipes to make, changed my closet over to sweaters and boots, painted my nails grey, my toes blood-red and I even…dyed my hair brown! For some reason that felt like the biggest F-U to summer.

Kate McClafferty has brown hair now, Summer!

Not only do I love fall and winter but they are shaping up to be a pretty fun travel filled few months. We are heading to North Carolina at the end of September with Brian’s family for a wedding. While I have never met the people getting married, I do love a good wedding, enjoy traveling with Brian’s parents and I’ve never been to North Carolina before! Win, win, win. Then in October, I head to Ojai for a yoga retreat with my favorite yoga teacher and sweet friend Jennifer Pastiloff. Her “manifestation retreats” are known to be life-changing, amazing and FUN. I mean there is even going to be Karaoke yoga! Oh and wine. So again this is a win. Then, on November 2nd, Brian and I take off on our adventure to Nepal…with a stop in Hong Kong first! Hong Kong was a recent addition and I am excited about it. We have to stop there anyway on a layover and have decided to make a trip out of it. Why land in Hong Kong, and not see it right?? When we get back from our trip,(if I survive the 10 day trek) the craziness of the holidays begin- my absolute favorite time of year! Then, somehow, it will be 2013? WHAAAAAT?

Are you guys as excited for the change of seasons as I am???

Signed,

your brown-haired blogger friend Kate

zeeee list is done!

25 Jul

I’ve certainly taken my sweet ass time deciding on what my new goals for the year will be, haven’t I? In my defense, I found it extremely hard to choose them this time around, maybe because I now know how much effort it takes to make them a reality and I want to choose them carefully. I also really want to be thoughtful about what I want to accomplish this year- my first year as a thirty year old. I want to pick goals that feel like the organic next step for me in my career, relationships and life.

My long time readers may notice that a few of my goals have been carried over from last year. Why? Well, because I haven’t accomplished them yet and I still want to!

Let the fun begin! Here goes…

 Volunteer as a big sister

I decided that when I volunteer this year I want to work with children. I also now know, after last years volunteer work at PATH (People Assisting The Homeless) that I prefer working on a one on one basis. Armed with those two pieces of information, I settled on volunteering as a big sister. I am realllllly looking forward to this experience.

Overseas trip with Brian

Brian and I both LOVE to travel (Thank God because I honestly don’t know if I could be with somebody who didn’t love to travel too) The last big trip we took together was to Nicaragua in 2011 and it was amazing experience. Well, other than the stomach bug we both got, but hey, it only brought us closer. We have both been visualizing another trip somewhere foreign and are on a mission to accomplish it this year. Our top choice would be a trip to Thailand and Cambodia but we would pretty much go anywhere for the right deal as long is it was out of the country and neither of us had been before.

Nicaragua April 2011

Art

I have always been a fan of the book “The Artists Way” (side note- you must read it if you haven’t. Even if you don’t consider yourself an artist it’s still inspiring) One of the tenets that I love most in the book is the idea of taking yourself on artists dates once a week. What’s an artist date? Anything that brings you inspiration and makes you feel alive- a trip to the museum by yourself, a walk in a new neighborhood, painting classes, pottery classes, photo projects, spend the day watching a bunch of old films, go somewhere you haven’t been since you were a child, take yourself on a picnic in the park, finger paint, garden….you see where I am going with this right? I got to thinking about how long it’s been since I have made time for such things in my life on a regular basis…too long. So this year I want to get back into carving out the time to take myself on a date once a week.

New living space

We really need to move from our sweet 1 bedroom home into something different. It makes us both sad because we LOVE our little place by the beach (morning walks on the sand are hard to beat!) but we really want a bigger space, a yard, an updated kitchen and I personally want a bigger closet- my shoes are cramped!

French Bulldog

Frank! I’m coming for you!

Ballet classes

When I was a little girl, I danced ballet for 10 years and I found such joy in it. The other day I got to thinking..why can’t I take ballet again at 30? Clearly, I’m not trying to become a professional dancer or anything but there must be classes for a girl to have a little fun in, right? So what it’s been twelve years (oy) since I put my point shoes on! Like riding a bike, right?!

Publish my writing

This is a carry over from last year. I. Still. Want. To. Accomplish. This. Goal…very badly. Onward!

Yoga retreat

Considering I am a yoga nut, I can’t believe that I have never been on a retreat. This year that is going to change! I signed up for Jennifer Pastiloff’s Manifestation Yoga Retreat in Ojai, CA in October. If you have read my blog before than you know that Jennifer is not only one of my favorite yoga teachers, she’s also a dear friend. Her retreats are known to be beyond amazing and I am so excited! I also get to sleep in a yurt with a bunch of other people….so there’s that to be excited about too.

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6 Jan

INSPIRATION, GRATITUDE & SURPRISES

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-What inspired me this week?-

My new vision board! I lurve it. Brian’s board is pretty fab too but he wouldn’t let me post pictures of his (understandably so. I think I’m the only asshole that would share their vision board with the world-wide web). Trust me though, his is good. For a guy who isn’t into “new age” stuff, he really grasped the concept.

The word “movement”

My volunteer meeting with PATH (People assisting the homeless). I start working with them next week. I will be volunteering in the job search department, helping write cover letters for the residents!

My friend Jen’s amazing article, “I had this dream I was perfect”…her writing is so honest and fabulous!

Love this article 

-What am I grateful for this week?-

My pops! Happy Birthday Daddy. SO happy you were born

 I have said it before but I am deeply grateful for yoga. It makes me a much more agreeable person to be around! (with less anxiety too. YAY YOGA!)

Manuk for teaching me his Schnitzel 

The LA weather. 85 degrees in January…yes please

365 til 30 has had a really great week! Thanks readers! I am so grateful for you.

-What surprised me this week?-

How much I LOVE this song! I’m surprised because it’s not a song I would normally like but when I heard it on KCRW’s morning becomes eclectic  I fell in love with it. It makes me want to dance! Actually, it did make me dance!

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“Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle”

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