Tag Archives: fabulous women

project 30 – raluca

16 Oct

RalucaState

Raluca, 36 / from the fabulous blog  What Would Gwyneth Do 

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

Worry less. Have more fun. You have lots of time to worry, now is the time to live life a little more. Experiment and experience. You don’t HAVE to have your perfect career/perfect man/perfect home at 23. If you find it by then, great. If not, use this time to keep looking and trying new things.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

Saving for a rainy day. My husband and I look back at our 20s and how little we put away in savings – until late in the decade when we got pregnant with our first – and wish we had saved more and splurged (a little) less. You don’t need to put away ALL your money at that age (see my point above about having FUN!), but get a start on some savings so that your 30s – and all the expenses that can come with them – aren’t such a rude awakening.

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

My physical appearance. I wish I could have embraced it with the confidence that comes in your 30s because it was definitely worth embracing! I was too busy picking myself apart to appreciate what I had. It’s harder work in your 30s with a slowing metabolism, post-baby body and early signs of aging, but oddly enough, I have the confidence now that I should have had then.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

Too many to count. I moved to Los Angeles from Montreal and embarked on a whole new life, which was a brave move for me at that time. I got married and had my first baby in my 20s, so those were amazing milestones. And building my career in that decade was fun, too. I grew a lot, learned a lot and experienced a lot of amazing things.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

Sort of right where I am. Married to my college sweetheart, with kids. We are in the suburbs which I have always been on the fence about (no pun intended, but it’s a white picket fence, if you’re wondering)…I thought I might end up back in a city. I also work for myself, which I didn’t necessarily picture in my 20s. I was moving up the corporate ladder at the time but taking a detour and starting my own business was definitely the right move for me in my 30s.

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

It was starting to fall into place nicely, though of course I didn’t recognize it at the time. I am 36 now so your perspective can change a lot – for the better – in six years. I was married at 26, I had my daughter when I was 29 and started my own consulting business when I was 30. I was working from home and trying to figure out the working mother juggle, which felt very stressful at the time. I definitely had more insecurities and fears than I do now. And it was all wasted energy…of course, now that I look back on it, that is.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Every day. Every single day. Oh, the things I worried about in my 20s. And the funny part is, you think it’s a decade of do or die. Find the perfect career. Marry the perfect man. Find the perfect apartment or home. And then your tastes and goals and priorities shift so much in your 30s that you end up wanting to start all over again anyways! Except the man part, in my case. I don’t even necessarily want the job or home or handbag that I worried about so much back then. I want something entirely different. So I should have stopped worrying so much and enjoyed what I had. My mom, in her 60s, tried to tell me that all the time but I wouldn’t listen. Don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of fun in my 20s, but I do wish I was a little more carefree during that chapter of my life. Responsible and smart, but not so serious. Plenty of time to be serious later in life.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

Confidence. Not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. You just come into your own a little more. You’re not driven by trends or expectations, your preferences and approach to life become more authentic and more real because you have more confidence in your choices and your voice and your aesthetic. My older sister always promised me my 30s would be better than my 20s and she was right.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

The same in some ways, different in others. I think I will keep the husband and kids 😉 But I am still looking to evolve my career, my blog and my writing. There is still a lot to accomplish and look forward to on that front. I also hope to find a “forever home” by 40. We like where we are now but we feel like it’s still not “quite” the perfect space and place for us so we’re open to change. I’d like to feel more settled in that sense by the time I am 40. I have friends who are in that place now – completely 100% content with where they live, their home, their community – and I envy that. I also know that I am a creature of change and there’s a good chance that “100% settled” will just never be my approach to life. So I need to embrace that…and somehow convince my husband to do the same.

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

Everything happens for a reason. It’s a cliché quote, but I find it to be invaluable in good times and in bad. It’s all happening for some reason. That reason may not be apparent now, but it will be some day, in some way. And I take great comfort in that.

*

 

project 30 – amy nicole

11 Sep

index_3

Amy Nicole, 33 / owner of CHICSTUDIOS

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

I would tell my 20 something self that the hard work you are about to put in, the long hours and exhausting days, will show it’s success in the years to come. Just be patient.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

Rest. I did not rest, ever, which in my 20s seemed to work out ok, but now in my 30s I literally collapse on the weekends.

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

My failures. I felt at the time they were the biggest disappointment ever, but looking back, they are the key to my success today.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

All my travels. From places like Brazil, Mexico, Paris and Spain, I found such beauty and inspiration that I carry with me today.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

I manifested what I have today, and I worked hard to make it happen. I love exactly what I do work-wise. I have a beautiful family I adore and cherish. And I live in the place I dreamed to be, right by the ocean but close to a local airport, near by fabulous shopping and dining!

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

I am now 33, so three years ago I was living in New York City (I now live in Los Angeles), going to and from my makeup school (CHICSTUDIOS) everyday, expanding the space from the 1 classroom we started with to more than double the space in Manhattan and becoming a (NYSED) school- licensed by the Department of Education.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

The thought crossed my mind now and again, but I never let it consume me. If someone would have told me, when I had the idea or made me say it out-loud ‘I am going to start a makeup school in the heart of New York City’ I would have thought it was unattainable, but because I do not worry much about things like that, I just went for it!

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

The greatest gift is, the knowledge I have from the last ten years! The learning experience has been invaluable.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

I see a bright horizon…with more (real!) vacations! And, Several more makeup school locations (next one, is CHICSTUDIOS Los Angeles, Fall 2015).

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

My favorite quote, and one I truly live by, is by Deepak Chopra, “You must find the place inside yourself where nothing is impossible.”

*

CONNECT WITH AMY-

WEBSITE / INSTAGRAM / FACEBOOK / TWITTER / BIO

 

project 30 – jadis

21 Aug

photo (5)

Jadis, 31

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

In the end you’re really only competing with yourself and frankly you shouldn’t be competing with yourself at all because life is hard enough in the first place. Work at LOVING yourself and learning to forgive yourself. Self-awareness is the real root of personal power.

Also, wear bikinis now because you won’t be wearing them later.

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

My health and fitness. After bouts with illness that doctors, nutritionists and Chinese medical practitioners couldn’t explain or sort out I eventually found a solution in naturopathy. I now take my health very seriously by focusing on fitness and nutrition. You are nothing without your health.

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

Myself! I wish I had a fraction of time back that I spent stressing about how I would be perceived by other people in terms of my career, appearance and the things I owned. None of it matters anyway so I should have had more fun and enjoyed the journey rather than setting ridiculous markers of success that in the end no one but me cared about.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

I have so many great memories with friends and family, but the stand out one was actually a moment on my own. It was the journey from the airport to the hostel I was staying at in London having just reduced my entire life down to one suitcase, hopped on a plane and hoped for the best. The parks seemed so green, the trains so efficient and even the graffiti seemed artfully done. It was a moment seen through eyes that were only capable of perceiving possibility.

The next months and years would prove waaaay more challenging than I anticipated but in that moment, when I was stripped of all the external accouterments and labels, I felt optimism instead of insecurity. I felt closer to my real self and knew that something big was going to happen.   That journey marked the start of things I couldn’t event imagine.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

I never focused on a particular role or even a specific place but I had a sense of who I would be. I knew I would an authority in something marketing or advertising related and fostering a team of creative people to develop their own talents.

 And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

I was a Director at a start-up company I helped build that worked with Celebrity talent and managed to get a global first on Facebook that broke new ground in marketing and live entertainment. After the award wins I started speaking at industry conferences globally and at Universities to share my knowledge. I believe passionately in the need to share knowledge.

I was living with my long-term partner Simon in our flat in London and about to become a British citizen. Though I didn’t know it at the time, by 31 I would set up my own business and take my career to a whole new level.

Getting on that plane was the riskiest but the best decision I could have ever made.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Even if I didn’t know the direction I was headed I’ve always had unwavering self-belief. In a way it’s pretty naïve to just think things will work out, but I’ve had some pretty big obstacles in my life that have always made me look inwardly for strength to overcome them.

Though I had no hand in choosing it, I also take solace in my name, Jadis, which is an old French word that roughly translates to ‘Once Upon A Time’ because it was used to start a story. The day you’re born is the start of your story and though it unfolds around you, you always remain the central figure writing your own direction.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

Confidence. I’ve always been pretty confident but now I’ve got experience under my belt and more money in the bank which means when it comes to making decisions, I’m in a position of power to ask whether something will enhance me financially, professionally, spiritually or personally. If it’s not ticking the boxes I’m not doing it. Period.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

In the short-term I’m entering a pretty exciting phase of life planning not one, but two weddings with Simon in 2015. I’m looking forward to hopefully having children and continuing to develop my career. I’m looking forward to deepening relationships with people who have already stood the test of time. I’m also looking forward to giving more knowledge and making more time to the charities that matter to me.

I know this decade will have it’s own unique challenges but every decade does and I’m ready for it.

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

I can’t define myself by one but here are a couple that highlight some of the guiding principles in my life:

“God can dream a bigger dream for you than you could ever dream for yourself. Success comes when you surrender to that dream—and let it lead you to the next best place.”-Oprah

“Wolves don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep”

“Success is more permanent when you achieve it without destroying your principals”- Walter Cronkite

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new” Socrates

connect with jadis

website / twitter / linkedin 

photo (6)

 

project 30 – erin

31 Jul

EMH_01-crop

Erin of Coined LIfe, 30

What would your thirty something self tell your twenty something self?

Be kind to yourself – you’re learning. My 20’s were a time of self-discovery. It wasn’t until after I finished grad school in my mid-twenties before I fully understood that I could do ANYTHING I wanted with my life. Including creating a life for myself that had nothing to do with my formal education. That it’s more about the quality of life and taking risks than the security of a traditional job for me (it’s not for everyone, but I do know it isn’t for me!). I had a hard time focusing at work knowing I was supposed to be at my assigned spot for a set number of hours each week. I realized early into my “career” I should have had the “World’s Worst Employee” coffee cup in my cubicle!

What do you wish you took more seriously in your twenties?

I took myself TOO seriously in my 20’s. The only area I could have taken more seriously was better financial planning. I spent most of my 20’s living in expensive cities like Washington D.C. and L.A. and added travel and becoming a freelance web designer to the mix. Really, I have no regrets. It was well-worth it to have those experiences. Without taking those risks I wouldn’t be who I am nor where I am as a business owner. I’m taking my financial future more seriously in my 30’s (as one probably should).

What do you wish you took less seriously in your twenties?

Ummm… myself! After grad school I put myself in a position to move in a very professional trajectory with my career. Two years as a junior at a consulting firm. Go back and get my PhD (paid for by the firm, of course!). And then “working my way up” in D.C. Two years into my D.C. days I made the decision to follow my heart and moved to L.A. for my relationship at that time, which took me off course from the “original plan”. I stressed a lot about my decision to not follow “the plan” for a solid 2.5 years, but eventually L.A.’s creative vibe and my fellow creative friends (like Kate!) helped me to chill and not take myself too seriously.

Favorite memory from your twenties?

I traveled to Greece when I was 21 as part of a study abroad trip. That trip changed my worldview on so many levels – how I looked at food, cultivating relationships, politics and history. I grew up in a small town (pop. 500) and had gone to undergrad in a small town (pop. 17,000 with college students!). The experiences of traveling aside, I made a deep, unshakable friendship with one of my fellow travelers. She’s my soulmate in many ways. I can’t imagine that trip or my life without her.

In your early twenties where did you think you would be (live, work etc) by 30?

I thought I would be in D.C. doing the career thing!

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

By the age of 30 I had lived in Detroit for a year, followed by D.C. for two years, then onto Los Angeles for four years and finally moved back to the midwest in October of 2013 (at the age of 30). I have lived out of bags and boxes for most of the time since then as I transitioned into a new home and lifestyle. My boyfriend and I bought a home in June of this year in Columbia, Missouri. We’re settling in, blissfully awaiting the arrival of our first child in December of this year. Life is nothing like I pictured in my early 30’s; it is better than I could have ever imagined.

Where you ever worried it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Absolutely. In 2013 I went through a major breakup. I had been with my boyfriend at the time for almost 8 years and engaged to him for almost 2 years. One day in September of last year I had this moment of intense, acute clarity. I couldn’t see myself spending my life with nor marrying him, which had been my plan for many years. Most of my worry about what life would look like and how it would come together had been on my mind for the better part of a year before that day. In that day and in that moment of clarity I felt at peace, finally. Once I made the decision to end the relationship, I trusted everything would work out the way it should. It has worked out beyond any expectations I could have had.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

Knowing the value of my time. I was a “yes” person and a people-pleaser most of my life. Owning my own business and gaining wisdom (I hope!) with each passing year has given me the confidence to say “no” and not feel guilty for drawing a line. I know my priorities and value my time.

When you look out onto the horizon. What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

Traveling with my now-boyfriend / soon-to-be husband and our two amazing kids in the summertime, working and running my business(es!) during the rest of the year. We have our first child arriving in December of this year and would love to have one more after that. Being surrounded with lots of love and family time. I love the thought of having incredible little people in our life who are curious and having the means to share the world and fulfill their curiosities in my 40’s.

What’s a quote/ saying you try to live your life by?

Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience.” – Paulo Coelho (really anything by him “gets” my soul and the way I feel about life).

Connect with the lovely Erin!

blog, twitter and instagram @erinhaslag

_MG_2158

 

project 30 – jenna

16 Jul

I met Jenna a few years back when I wanted to write/ host for Takepart (I was so inspired by their mission actually I probably would have been happy cleaning their toilets) Well, once I set my sights on TakePart, I got lucky enough to score a meeting with Jenna, who was the VP of content at the time. Manifesting, people! I remember being nervous before that meeting because I so badly wanted to impress. Never a good energy. Anyway, as I was calming my nerves, in walks this confident, leggy, glowing, gorgeous blonde and I immediately had a crush on her. I later found out she was also smart, funny and easygoing, such a fabulous combination in a woman. We’ve kept in touch from time to time since that meeting. Most recently, she surprised me with a generous and thoughtful email after I wrote my piece on anxiety. She didn’t have to reach out, but she did. Meet, Jenna.

JennaBriand

What would your 30 something self tell your 20 something self if you could?

“Sing out loud in the car and don’t roll up the windows.”
“Go, spend the summer in Spain. Things will be here when you get back.”
“It’s just a cold, stop reading WebMD.”

What do you wish you took more seriously in your 20’s?

The assurances of many wise friends that things would work out fine. That, and the benefits of using sunblock.

What do you wish you took less seriously in your 20’s?

My self-imposed worries and fears.

Favorite memory from your 20’s?

Age 27. It’s not a single memory, but an amalgam of meaningful ones, all of which hinged on being single, solvent, surrounded by good friends, traveling, playing, and, for the first time, living 100% alone.

In your early 20’s where did you think you would be (work, live etc) by 30?

I had no idea! Which was probably at the root of my anxieties. I wanted answers, direction, an unwavering path. I wanted to be a person with one single, undeniable calling. Instead I kept focused on highly ambitious short-term goals – good ones – but having a 10-year view was never my strong suit.

And where were you by 30? What did your life look like?

When 30 did finally come, it was spectacular. Probably one of the most important years of my life. I travelled in Costa Rica and Belize. I sorted through some family baggage. I moved from LA to NYC with a fancy Internet job. And I met the man who would become my husband, in a bar on 15th street. That last event, in itself, gave me a sense of belonging I’d never known was possible.

Were you ever worried that it wouldn’t all fall into place?

Perpetually. I don’t think those worries ever go away completely. The difference, I suppose, is gaining perspective, losing unproductive fears, and landing on your feet enough times to actually believe that will keep happening.

What is the greatest gift about being a woman in your 30’s?

Everything! I think women in their 30s become their smartest, most beautiful, most confident selves. And nothing is sexier than a woman who is comfortable in her own skin.

What do you hope your life looks like at 40?

I’ve hit that milestone, too, so I already know – and my life looks better than I’d ever imagined. Married ten years, a daughter who is the love of my life, creative work with people I admire, and a peaceful spot in the hills to call home.

What I’m also grateful for but couldn’t have predicted is the degree to which simpler things bring me joy. I am still ambitious, but differently so – I care about the quality of my time more than I used to, and as a result, my life just keeps getting more interesting.

What’s a quote / saying you try to live your life by?

I have so many; I’m regularly inspired by how wise people string words together. For brevity’s sake…

One for my 20’s:
“Worrying doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

One for my 30’s:
”Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”

And one more, just for fun:
“When in doubt, give advice.”