Brian and I are a little over a month away from celebrating our first wedding anniversary. I cannot believe it’s been a year!? I’m not sure where the time has gone. Considering our 1st anniversary is nearing I thought it was about time I went through the tedious process of changing my last name. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to become Kate Glodney. I’ve unofficially been “Kate Glodney” since the day we got married. I was, instead, overwhelmed by all the paperwork and various government offices I would have to visit to make it official. I mean who elects to go to the DMV, right?
Lucky for lazy people like me, places like Kleinfeld exist and for a fee of fifty dollars they send you a packet in the mail with all the various government paperwork filled out for you. Well, minus sensitive info such as social security numbers. The packet also comes with very detailed step by step instructions on how to do it all. Perfect for people like me.
When I received the package in the mail….I thought…it would be pretty hard for me to F this up!…Glodney here I come!
First up, changing my name with the Social Security office. I didn’t make an appointment and instead went on a whim after a meeting with a client finished early. Let’s just say I’ve had better ideas. The wait time was 3 1/2 hours. To make matters worse my cell phone was dead and I didn’t have a book with me. Lesson learned…planning ahead can be beneficial! I was about to turn around and leave but part of me knew that if I did, there was a very good chance I wasn’t coming back.
So I waited.
Lucky for me the West LA Social Security office brings out some truly interesting people so, I survived the wait time by people watching and making up elaborate stories about their lives. I especially enjoyed the angry Russian woman who stood up every five minutes and announced to the obviously uninterested room that the wait time at this office was INSANE.
After many hours of this, my number was finally called. Once I sat down with an actual person the process was very fast and ten minutes later I was walking out of the Social Security Administration as….Kate Glodney.
WOOT!
The next stop on the name changing tour was The Department Of Motor Vehicles. This time I wised up and made an appointment before going. Equipped with my shiny new Social Security Card, our marriage license & all the finished DMV paperwork (typed rather than written, no less) I confidently walked in and got into the “appointment” line, which was two deep rather than fifty deep like the “no appointment” line. Clearly, I was on my game that day. I even managed to blow my hair out and wear a cute dress (rather than my normal jeans, t-shirt and messy hair in bun look) knowing I would be taking a new license photo that day.
This time I barely had a moment to sit down before my number was called. Winning! I walked up to the window with my handy-dandy name change folder and a big smile spread across my face. Lydia, the rather gruff lady behind the counter, dressed in a bright purple dress and wearing sparkly big earrings, that swung back and forth as she spoke, grabbed my paperwork and began working on entering my information.
To fill the time, I made small talk with the nice gentleman next to me about the heat wave we had been having in Los Angeles, all while listening to Lydia’s long nails clack against the keyboard.
Suddenly, Lydia’s nails came to a halt.
Oh, done already! I thought! Pays to be on top of things!
I turned towards Lydia and watched as her eyes narrowed at the computer screen.
Never a good sign.
“I’m sorry ma’am but I can’t put your paper work through at this time.” Lydia announced
“And why is that?” I asked
“Well, because you have a failure to appear and a warrant out for your arrest in Georgia, ma’am.” Lydia said loudly (and a bit too loudly if you ask me)
I glanced over at the kind gentleman I was speaking to with a moment prior. His gregarious smile had faded and had been replaced with…well, judgement….with maybe a sprinkle of intrigue?
I was about to dramatically yell…”that’s impossible…I’ve never even been to Georgia!!” when suddenly it all came back to me…oh yes…I most certainly have been to Georgia. Three years ago when I was driving across the country with Rachel during my 365 til 30 year and I did in fact get a speeding ticket…in Georgia.
One in which I ignored because well, it was very expensive and I stupidly thought…when am I ever going to be driving in Georgia again???
I guess I never thought about what happens when you don’t pay speeding tickets in other states.
Fail.
I glanced back at the man next to me and then back to Lydia, deciding it was the perfect time to put my big sunglasses back on.
I leaned into the window and causally asked, “Ok, so Lydia, now what???“
“Well, you’re going to have to clear this up with Georgia, Ma’am. Lucky for you this ticket only affects you in Georgia. There is nothing I can do for you here. I can’t even tell you how much you owe at this point. But I’m sorry but there is NO way you are changing your last name to Glodney today.”
Damn you, past!
When I got in the car I decided it was best to text Brian at work with the news rather than come clean about it over dinner. I mean who wants to have the “I have a warrant for my arrest in Georgia” conversation with their husband over a roast chicken, you know?
me:
So, I couldn’t change my name with the DMV today because of my failure to appear for a speeding ticket in Georgia. Kinda funny but NOT.
brian:
Does that mean you have a warrant????
me:
Well yeah, but only in Georgia…I just need to pay the ticket for it all to get cleared.
brian:
How much is the ticket now???
me:
I don’t know. I have to call Georgia. Any interest in a road trip to Georgia??
brian:
hahahahah. no not anymore. I don’t need you being arrested.
The text admission went well don’t you think?
Top of my to-do list this week….clear name in Georgia. Le sigh
* this post was clearly not sponsored by Kleinfeld name change *
:
365til30.com 
Girl on the run, huh? Only kidding 🙂
Our system is so different over here. Our tickets are managed by a national system, and if you don’t pay they cancel your licence and can in fact take you to court to pay the ticket. I remember when my sister got married all the paperwork she had to fill out! Ouch! The name change service sounds like a great thing.
Oh, and if you went to our version of the DMV over here, you might just be served by my Mum 🙂 And she doesn’t have a gruff bone in her body.
Good luck with being on the lam, I mean, paying your ticket 🙂
Should we start calling you Bonnie?
I would have much preferred having your mum! I bet she’s lovely. Oh and yes….just call me Bonnie:)
Not only is this true of any ticket in all 50 states and DC, it also applies to Puerto Rico, the border states of Mexico and all of Canada. I learned this from a sheriff I know in Colorado.
Better you learned it from a sheriff in Colorado than the way I did! Lesson learned 🙂
That is actually kind of funny in a wtf kind of way. But seriously, it’s a speeding ticket! You didn’t rob anyone or try to kill anyone. Doesn’t our justice system have better things to do? I’m just going to teleport everywhere from now on.
Believe me I was actually laughing at the whole situation as well! I think you may be on to something about teleporting everywhere. Hmmmmm:)
I don’t know why it always has to be so awful at these places. Last August, I realized that my ID was about to expire and I was getting ready to fly to Colorado. So, I went to get my ID renewed. They wouldn’t renew it because my social didn’t match my ID. I believe the reason was because my middle name was on my social but not on my ID. How silly, right? So, I had to go to the social office to get a new social. But, I didn’t have enough proving I was myself even though I had the old ID, the old social, my marriage license, but I didn’t have a bill in my name. So, I had to go to my dermatologist! And they had to give me a copy of my first appointment in paper form with my address on it. I brought that back to social security and they accepted it BUT they told me I could keep my middle and my maiden name (I hyphenated because from personal experience-you have to pay to take your maiden name back where as if you are a hyphenate you just drop the married name:), so I chose to make my maiden name my new middle name and they finally gave me a new social. And I then was able to get back to the DMV to get the new ID. Remember, I had to wait in all those crazy lines twice each, plus drive all over Florida and everything was finally in order just 1 day before I had to fly out. There should definitely be a better way! 😉
OMG I LOVE THIS POST! I had a similar situation on my side with CA and a really dumb ticket that was lost in the mail with moving last year. I mailed in everything (not by certified mail – dumb mistake on my part) and when it “never arrived” I got a nasty bunch of letters to follow once CA finally wizened up to using my new address. $350 on a lawyer and $250 in ticket fees for a $25 ticket from a year ago. But I have to have everything cleared up for our daughter’s birth and name changes in the year to come, too.
So many expensive lessons learned in the process … I feel your pain!
Oh no! I’m sorry to hear about this but I’ll agree with some of the ladies above…it’s kind of comical! We finally paid a ticket that we were given while in San Francisco! It’s easy to forget about those types of things when you’re far removed!