We’ve been in our new house for exactly seven days and I have spent most of them either in shock that this is my new home (I mean it’s reaaaallllly pretty), depressed about the change (I don’t do change well- I miss our little rundown bungalow by the beach that I used to complain about) or feeling like I’m living in a dream world (this is my life?!?!?!). I feel like I am squatting at a real adults super nice house and I’m going to get kicked out soon. I also feel completely overwhelmed by the reality of it. A mortgage?! These last few months have been amazing, everything I could have ever wanted, but, the last few months have also been filled with a lot of adult activities – you know getting engaged, planning a wedding and buying a place and all of a sudden it hit me like a freight train when we moved in- I’m an adult. I’ve arrived!!! SHIT. Now what?
Gone are the days of staying out till 3 am on a weeknight with friends just because I felt like it. Gone are the days of spending my paycheck on shoes instead of saving it. Gone are the days of wondering what I will be like when I grow up (It’s kinda a fun game to play, huh? SOOO many possibilities).
Because I am a grown up. AND it’s scary. AND lovely. AND exciting. AND overwhelming. AND I’m happy. AND I mourn the other stage a bit. AND I’m in wonder. AND I feel blessed. AND I feel like an imposter most days.
I’m not going to lie…it’s been a bit of a hard week. I feel stupid even admitting that considering everything I have to be thankful for. But, it’s the truth. One of the many complicated things about being a human being.
What inspired me this week?
This incredibly honest and heartfelt post by Erin of Well In LA
This post by Katie Devine of Confessions Of An Imperfect Life
This sweet post about motherhood by Naomi of Love Taza
The view I get of the sunset each night from our new living room. EPIC
Being honest about my feelings
What am I grateful for this week?
When I told my momma that I was feeling low she immediately came over to hang- just dropped everything and came right over. We sat around scouring the internet for a dining table. Have I ever told you she’s a brilliant interior designer?? Shameless plug, huh?
I have a washing machine, a dishwasher and a two person tub now! The two person tub has already been put to use!
I have THE BEST fiancée in the ENTIRE WORLD. It’s a fact.
What surprised me this week?
How hard I took all the change this week.
Waking up every morning with one swollen eye. WHY? Maybe I’m allergic to the detergent I used to clean the sheets? Lame
Moving boxes seem to populate during a move. It feels like they are endless and taking over our home!
“The trick is growing up without growing old.”